If I Were A Mean Girl
I like to think of myself as a nice person. Wait, let’s rewind that. I AM a nice person. How do I know that? Where to start? I hold doors open for others whether they’re coming in or coming out behind me. When I’m out and about I offer a friendly smile and hello to strangers that pass.
I give back to local charities. I give words of encouragement when I see someone is having a bad day. If I have money to spare, I stop and give the money to the first person I see beside road with a sign. That little bit of extra change goes a long way for them. I’m polite in my speech and treatment of others. You get the point.
However, I’m starting to think that folks are mistaken my niceness for being a flashing a sign that says ‘Pushover!’ About a week or two ago, we found out that our neighbors have a dog. How did we find out? Well, the first clue came when I was rushing to make it to JJ’s doctor appointment and I stepping in dog poop! Talk about being pissed.
Traffic here is unpredictable and I was frustrated that I had to unbuckle the kids, herd them back in the house, clean my shoes, round them up again, set the alarm and then drive like a mad woman through traffic to make it on time. Sure enough the next day, I looked out my window and there one of my neighbors was with a little miniature something (I couldn’t get a really good look to determine the breed, but it was super small) taking a crap right on the walkway.
She must have saw me moving in the window, getting to knock on it because she looked up. I nodded down at the fresh poop and then looked back her. (I’ve got silent communication down to a science. When you’ve had to send your child those silent looks or nods, it’s all practice helping you master your skill and use it on others). She retrieved a baggie from her jacket pocket and picked it up. Satisfied, I closed the blinds and went on my way.
Now, one would think that said neighbor would know that I don’t like dog poop on my side of the yard. So, please explain why I almost stepped in dog poop again today? And not once but twice! I went outside to put out the recycling and trash and there were three medium sized piles of fresh dog poop to greet me! Talk about being beyond pissed.
I shouldn’t be surprised though. You know why? I’m too nice. I should have gone beyond the silent communication the first time I caught her dog pooping on our side of the yard. My neighbors are young (college age), but still I thought my silent nod & look were easy to understand. Apparently not folks.
But as my baby brother would say, “They gone learn today” that I’m serious about this dog poop. I’m not a mean girl, but if I was you know what I do? I would have let our a loud ‘Oh hell no!’ Then I would have marched back inside the apartment and dug out my mini shovel. I would have deposited the first pile of poop on the hood of their car. The second pile I would have left right in front of their door. And the third pile, I have would bribed a fast running person with money to knock on their door and give them a poop facial once they opened it!
Y’all already know I’ve had it to a third dimension and back with this apartment. I’ve been understanding of the neighbors loud noise from their impromptu college get togethers, their company parking in our space when we’re gone and more. But this I will NOT tolerate. I remember being fresh out of high school and in college. I didn’t disrespect people’s property though and I won’t stand for mine being disrespected or invaded.
Luckily for my neighbors I’m not a mean girl. I know Jesus and after venting to the Mr, I’ve calmed down (not enough to not write this post though). I’m to collect the poop in a bag and leave it with a note in front of their door. (They’ve been missing since a little scuffle broke at one of their parties two days ago). But to make sure they get the message, when I know they’re back, I’m sending the police over to have a little chat with them.
There are rules about here about pets and pet owners allowing their animals to use the bathroom in other people’s yards or on public property. Those violations are punishable by law and they need to know that. They also need to know that I mean business. We might be flying this coop soon, but we haven’t left it yet. And I’m not going to be hop scotching over poop to get my trash and recycling cans or to our car!
How would you handle this situation? Would you go Mean Girls on your neighbors if they did this?