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  • Invisible Mommy

    We’ve been going to storytime at our local library for almost three months now.  The first few times we went, we were the only Black family there.  Heck, we were the only minority family there.  As I have mentioned before, we live in a predominantly White neighborhood.  So, I already knew what to expect.

    Having grown up in a predominantly White town, I was often the only the Black student in my honors and AP classes.  Being the sole minority of a group doesn’t really bother me.  What has been bothering me is the fact that other moms are clearly not comfortable with having my kids and I in their mist.  And this is sad because our storytime group has since grown and there is another Black family that comes too.

    I feel like the Invisible Mommy when other Black family isn’t there because none of the other ladies have so much as tried to say hi.  And yes, I have spoken first.  I know that racism is alive and well but for goodness sake people it’s 2012.  I’m not buying into that whole ‘maybe they’ve never seen Black people before’ crap.

    And honestly, it wouldn’t bother me so but this week something happened that had me seeing red and ready to throw some elbows.  After storytime the routine is that we all hang out in the play area and let the kids get their energy out.  Well, this week when we went to the play area that were a few other moms and a dad there.  Three of the four families were White and one was Hispanic.

    Now, Moo is very outgoing and loves to play.  So, she took off for the play area ready to have fun and play with the other kids.  I decided to grab some books for us to read later off a bookshelf directly in front of the play area.  Moo joins me and says sadly, “They won’t play with me.”  By they she meant the White kids.

    I ask her if she asked them to play she says yes but they wouldn’t speak to her.  I’m starting to get pissed.  Why?  Well, for months she and those other girls have been playing together with no problems.  And now they won’t even talk to her?  I tell her to go play puzzles with some girls that are sitting at one of the tables.

    Their mom promptly instructs them that they’re about to leave and they do. At this point, Moo is sad because she has nobody to play with.  And I’m pissed to hell and about ready to make a scene right in the middle of the play area.

    My kids are my life!  It’s one thing if you don’t want to chum it up with me, I have friends already.  However, you’re schooling your kids on how to be rude and ignorant towards my daughter, hurting her feelings is not okay.  Those girls were her friends until this week. I’m just beyond disappointed that anybody could act like this.

    The silver lining is that the Hispanic kids came to play with her and the other Black mom showed up with her kids once the mean mommies cleared out.  So, she did get to play and she made a new friend.  Now, I’m debating in my mind if I need to confront the other moms about their rudeness or just keep moving.  I’m leaning more towards keeping it moving because it could get nasty and I don’t like to expose my kids to conflict.

    Have you ever experienced racism before in family setting?

  • Thankful Thursday

    This week I’m thankful that Moo’s tummy is feeling better.  The week before last we had a little trip to the Emergency Room and last week we went for a follow up at the pediatrician.  Now, we’re working on getting her hives and check.  This sudden flareup in her allergies kind of scares me and makes me wonder if I should rethink her starting preschool this fall. The Mr and I talked briefly about that today.
    I’m also thankful that our loud and rude neighbors have moved out. It’s so much more peaceful and calm.  We were not the least bit sad to see them go to be honest.  I’m also thankful that I finally got the chance to finish Fifty Shades of Grey.  I loved it!
    I love British authors and their writing style.  I had read mixed reviews about this book and decided and to give it a read myself.  If you can look beyond the sex scenes, this book is deep.  I definitely could relate Ana and her some of inner struggles.  And I definitely saw a lot Christian’s characteristics in a few of the bad boys I dated/talked to.
    I’m most thankful that my packages arrived on time.  For those of you new to YUMMommy or who don’t follow me on Twitter, I’ve had issues with our post office misplacing large packages before.  I was a little hesitant about ordering the Mr a Father’s Day gift from online but I’d been searching all the local stores for this one thing and nobody had it. I’m thankful that it’s here, undamaged and wrapped.
    I’m also thankful that my little man has four teeth now.  His top front teeth are in but I think we have some back teeth coming in.
    What’s on your thankful list?

  • Making Progress

    This weekend I made some really good progress on my goals list for this month.  One of the main projects I worked on was redesigning stuff for the YUMMommy Shop and researching different vendors.  Here are a few of the designs I like thus far.  Let me know what you all think.
    My favorite!

    And if it’s not too much to ask Vote for the Discovery Place in the Social Madness Competition.  They’re listed under the Medium Company tab.  They do so much in terms of educating kids here in the Queen City and being involved in the community.  They are an official nonprofit.  So be sure to help them out with your vote please!

  • 5 Things I Learned From Kris Jenner

    Yes, I read the book.  I was hearing a lot of buzz about it and wanted to see for myself if it was worth the hype.  Honestly, Kris Jenner …and All Things Kardashian was a great book!  It was one of those reads that I couldn’t put down.  The book was not what I expected it to be, but in a good way.  
    She talks about her childhood and growing up without her father being in her life on a consistent basis.  She’s very open about her life and relationships.  And if you’ve been watching the new season of Keeping Up With The Kardashians then you already know that she talks in great detail about having an affair with a younger man while married to her late ex-husband Robert Kardashian.
     I really recommend you get the book and give it a read.  Now on to the 5 things I learned.
    Have Self-Control
     In talking about her affair and the disillusion of her marriage Kris says, “…[T]here are ups and downs and changes in life, but you have to have self-control.  You have to understand that relationships have their ebbs and flows, and that life just evolves.  It is about love and friendship.  It’s not always about passion and heat.”
    This is something I really wish a lot of people would learn before they tie knot.  We get in marriages expecting passion and heat to fizzle or flicker and that’s not realistic.  Like she said, there are going to be times when you probably can’t stand each other another minute.  However, it’s exercising self-control and waiting the storm out that will keep your marriage together.  Nobody is ever the same person their whole life. Things happen and ultimately we change and being with someone is about being willing to accept those changes or work through them.
    Environment Is Everything
    “Don’t ever discount your environment.  Where you live, work, and play has a powerful effect on your happiness and productivity.”
    Now, I’ve been talking a lot about how I hate our current place (environment).  And honestly, I haven’t been as happy or productive as I need to be.  It’s really starting to take a toll on me and the way I interact with certain people.  It didn’t dawn on me until I read this that my environment is having a negative pull on me.  Thank goodness we’re about to change it.
    I want to be happy not just inward, but I want to be happy about where I live, continue to build my brand and make memories with my family.
    Dreams Are Not Impossible
    How many of us had dreams before we had children or got married?  I know I did.  But it seems like somewhere along the way of becoming a mommy and wife they got lost.  Or I talked myself into thinking I had to give them up.  Well, Kris was managing four kids by the time she was age and could definitely relate to these feelings.
    However, she overcame them.  “Never give up on your dreams just because life gets in the way,” she says.  “No matter how long you’ve had a dream, it can still come true if you persevere.”
    Get To Know The Right People
    “If someone says no, you’re talking to the wrong person.”
    I couldn’t agree a more with this statement.  Since, the decline of the economy a while back it’s become all about knowing the right people when trying to get doors opened.
    Make Being Nice A Habit
    “This is something to remember: you never know what opportunity is going to present itself-or where.  …Business 101: Be nice to everybody.  Never take anyone at face value.”
    CEOs aren’t always dressed in suits and ties.  You might bump into them on vacation and if you don’t recognize them outside of their work attire, you could be tempted to blow off somebody very important.
    Have you read Kris’ book?  Will/do you apply any of these lessons to your life?

  • The Halfway Mark

    It’s really June already?!  Wow, it’s hard to believe that the halfway mark for 2012 has arrived.  I know I say this often but time is flying by.  It’s almost a little bit scary to think about it.  I had to do a double take at the calendars on my computer and phone before I flipped the page on my wall calendars.
    With only six more months left in this year, I feel like I need to crack the whip harder to make sure I accomplish all my goals.  Not going to lie this year has been good to me so far.  I’ve been featured in a magazine that is sold all around the world and the YUMMommy community has grown.  I’ve found a new church that I love.  The list goes on.  
    However, I still have a ways to go.  So, since you all have always been so supportive of YUMMommy and just me as a person, I’ve decided to start sharing more about journey towards reaching my goals.  There are times when I feel defeated and times where I want to throw in the towel.  And I think that having this platform at my disposable to talk about what I’m feeling, the progress I’m making and to ask for help is truly a godsend!  I realize that I’m still young and I’m still new to this whole blogging/writing game.
    With that said, my goals for this month are:
    ~Revamp YUMMommy Store:  I really want to take YUMMommy beyond just being on the web.  Having merchandise is a way to make that possible.  So, I’m going to be working hard to find a different company to partner with because the overhead prices of the current company I’m with is just out of this world.  I’d love to use the money from those sales to help go towards doing more charitable projects, giving the blog a complete redo and more.
    ~Interact More With The YUMMommy Community:  I really want to make a conscious effort to get to know more about the ladies (and men) who are helping to hold it down for YUMMommy.  Like I’ve already said, your support means the world to me.  Therefore, I don’t ever want to come off as one of those bloggers who’s to good to mingle because I’m not.  So, feel free it hit me up on Facebook and Twitter!
    ~Post Everyday:  No more going long periods of time without posting.  Trust me, I know that in order to attract and keep an audience that I have to give them something fresh to read and discuss.  Not to mention I feel bad when I go long periods without posting because this blog is very much like a diary for me also.  And with life being so busy and going by in the blink of an eye, I enjoy having this to look back on and being able to relive certain memories in my mind.
    ~Get Sponsors:  I can’t stress enough how important it is and how easier life is when you have blog sponsors.  These people have a wealth of resources at their disposable that aren’t available to the average person.  And if you work hard enough at maintaining a great blogger-sponsor relationship, you might even find your future mentor.
    ~Tone Up:  While I’ve well with shedding pounds, I now need to focus on toning up.  I’m all for accepting your body and loving it as it is.  However, I know what my body was before I had kids and what it can be after kids.  I’m realistic in the fact that I’m probably never going to see a size 2 again but whatever size I end up at, I don’t want to have to be weighed down with girdles and shapewear.
    It’s very important that I feel comfortable and confident in my appearance when I’m out and about.  I can not be representing YUMMommy looking “busted and disgusted” as my younger sister would say.  I’m thankful that I’ve been able to go from a size 12/14 to a size 7/8 and even a size 6 depending on the brand and cut.   That in and of itself is a huge accomplishment.  Shout to Healthy Latina who’s always tweeting me back good fitness vibes!
    What are your goals for June?
    P.S.-If you see posts with blacked out boxes where pictures used to be it’s because I accidentally deleted them with Google+.  I’m working getting around to re-uploading them all.

  • Thankful Thursday

    Hope everyone had a really great Memorial Day weekend.  We stayed inside because of course our weather still can’t make up its mind and it rained.  Then Moo was sick.  Those two and a half weeks we spent at my mom’s sent her allergies in to overload because my mom has a dog and she feeds Moo things she’s not suppose to have.
    However, I’m thankful that we’re detoxing her body and getting her back on track.  We went for her check up Tuesday and the only serious thing was that she was a little dehydrated but not enough that they needed to admit her into the hospital.  So, we’ve been pumping her full of fluids.  Through it all she’s been a trooper though.
    And while we’re on the subject of kids, I’m really thankful for this whole motherhood experience that I’ve been blessed to have.  These last few days I’ve really been thinking a lot about where my life would be without my children.  Being a mom just brings so much more joy and purpose to my life.
    Also, I’m thankful that I’ve found a preschool that might be a great fit for Moo.  It’s not an arm and a leg but I still have to talk with the Mr and see how we can squeeze it into our budget because moving day is coming up.  So, I’m keeping my fingers crossed.
    I’ve started work on my third book and am thankful that my writer’s block finally broke.  Over the next few weeks, I’ll be working hard to get it finished, get a book cover designed, get it edited and then published.  It’s really excited because I already have a nonfiction book, a children’s book and now I’m working on an adult fiction piece.  Who knows, this could be my New York Times bestseller.
    What are you thankful for this week?
    P.S.- The Discovery Place is in need of all sized soda bottles, toilet paper & paper towel tubes, milk jugs and cartons, egg cartons, cereal and cardboard boxes and Altoid tins.  So, if you’re in the Queen City area or don’t mind picking up a flat rate box and mailing your donation, they would greatly appreciate it!

  • Put A Ring On It

    So, my latest obsession has been statement rings.  Idk, my ring hand just feels so naked.  Plus, when I’m out and about I’m always spotting these women wearing the cutest statement rings.  But anyways, here are a few of the ones I’ve been eyeballing over at JGOOD.  They are my go to now for fashion jewelry.
    French Victorian Black & White Ring

    Pave Crystal Dome Cocktail Ring
    Swirled Micropave Crystal Hematite Dome Ring
    Onyx Cab CZ Encrusted Ring
    Hematite Emerald Crystal and Enamel Ring
    Are you a statement ring kind of gal?

  • Things That Make Me Say Hmmm…

    It’s been a while since I’ve done of these posts.  However, there’s been a lot of stuff going on that has got me going hmmm…  What stuff?  Pull up a seat and let me tell you.
    1. Don’t Be Tardy For The Wedding:  I don’t know where to begin.  A lot of stuff on this show has me rubbing my chin. Like how is that Kroy’s parents didn’t meet their grandson until he was like 6 months old?  Clearly Kroy is balling.  Not Diddy or Donald Trump balling but still balling enough that he could have sprung for some airplane tickets to fly them down after the delivery.
    But then, I remembered what Rose, Kim’s physic, said about them not liking her and Kroy pretty much confirmed it that episode when they came to visit.  He said that she wasn’t at all what they had in mind for him in terms of a wife or life partner.   So, maybe that has something to do with why they waited so long.  And why was Kim acting like she had never used a can opener before?
    Manual can openers were around before she met Big Poppa and started being able to afford eating out everyday.  And when she said she had never cooked a piece a meat before, I was giving her some major side eye because I’m pretty sure she’s never been vegan or vegetarian.   Then on the most recent episode she got missed off at her maid of honor Jenn because she went MIA. 
    Didn’t she say in the very first episode that Jenn doesn’t like to be in the lime light?  Well, if you have tons of cameras watching your every move and photographers hoovering around, what else did you expect her to do?  She desire to not be in the spotlight wasn’t going to change because you made her the maid of honor. Overall, I like Kim away from the RHOA.  We get to see a softer side of her, especially when she’s in mommy mode.
    2. Mom Wars:  Like really don’t we as women have enough stuff to fight over like equal pay, the right for our health insurance to pay for birth control or how about trying to elect the first female president?  So, why are we fighting each other and being so judgmental?  Let me tell you, I have no desire to prove my mommyhood to ANYBODY!!  Just because I breastfeed doesn’t mean I look down on those moms that choose to formula feed. To each her own.
    Some these moms out here need get off their high horses and go take a long sit down.  None of are in the position to be looking down upon any other mom because she chooses to get plastic surgery, decides that attachment parenting isn’t right for her or any of the other nonsense that’s been going on.  Just worry about you and your own partna!  Cause in the words of TI “You don’t know me!”
    3. Duets: Did you all catch the season premiere last Thursday?  I did.  I have to admit that while I love, love, love John Legend, I was very disappointed in him picking Bridget over the blonde haired girl.  Yes, she was more pleasing on the eyes but her voice didn’t have that wow factor for me.  I thought she was just ok.  I’m hoping that this doesn’t turn into one of those competitions where the judges are going to vote based on who ‘looks’ like a star.
    I was very disappointed when both of Kelly’s picks were in the bottom two and a bit confused.  Jason’s voice is AMAZING, especially for his age.  I thought he should have been in the top 4 at least.  And everybody kept saying how Jordan sounded just like Kelly but then you vote her dead last?  Like what are you trying to say about Kelly’s voice then?
    And wardrobe did not do a good job in styling Alexis.  That dress didn’t fit her well at all. She could barely move in those heels.  And French roll do gave her a weird profile.  I hope this week they do better at capturing ‘her’ style.
    Anything make you say hmmm… recently?

  • Shaping Up With CoolSculpting

    I’m sure many of you have seen me tweeting about Operation Bridesmaid Dress and even talking about my goal to drop these last few baby pounds.  I have made lots of progress.  I’ve gone from wearing plus size clothes to a size 7/8.  Before I had kids I was a size 4 sometimes a 2, but I’m a realist and will settle for getting to a size 6.
    However, despite all of my progress I’m still not completely happy with physical look of things in the mid section area.  The dreaded mom pooch you hear some women talk about it real yall.  While mine has shrunk,  I’m just ready for it to be 100% gone.  So, I’ve been thinking a lot about trying out CoolSculpting.  I’ve read and heard nothing but good things about this treatment.
    For those of you who haven’t heard about it, CoolSculpting is a non-surgical procedure in which a doctor freezes and destroys stubborn fat cells that just won’t go away.  This is great because I’m terrified of doing anything that requires going under the knife and there’s little to no downtime afterwards.  What’s even better is that each treatment takes about an hour.  So, I can be in and out.  Of course, I would have make a consultation a doctor to know how many treatments I’d need to treat my problem area.
    Another great plus is that this procedure doesn’t damage the skin.  A special applicator with CoolSculpting technology is used to zap those fat cells and then my body will dispose of them naturally.  And the best part is that with Alive After Five events going on here in Charlotte,  the CoolSculpting team is out and about to give people a little bit more information about what actually this treatment is and how it works.  For me this is perfect because I can ask questions and learn more about the whole process to make sure it’s right for me.
    I think I could have some really great results with this.  Check out these before after picture below.
    What do you think?  Interested in trying CoolScultping?  Click here to find a doctor’s office and schedule your appointment.
    Be sure to enter the Let’s Get Naked in LA Sweepstakes too!  
    You’ll not only win a VIP trip to LA, but a CoolSculpting treatment as well.  Sounds like a pretty sweet prize to me.  Check out all the details here.
    So would you try CoolSculpting?
    Disclosure:  This post is sponsored by CoolSculpting. However, all views and opinions expressed are 100% my own.

  • Thankful Thursday

    Remember, a while back I wrote about how we were trying to find a church up here to go instead of me driving two hours both ways to go to church in my hometown?  Well, I’m thankful to say that I have found the church for us!!  It’s been a long time coming (over a year but who’s counting).  God and spirituality are very important to me.  Therefore, it was really bothering me about not having found a church here to go to.
    Not to mention, one of the goals on my vision board was to strengthen my relationship with God.  So, I’m totally looking to getting more involved in the church.  Plus, now is the time I need to start making sure Moo and JJ have a great foundation on which they can build a relationship with God.  And this church seems to have some really great activities for children.
    They also have some great activities and opportunities for couples.  And working on my marriage was another goal on my vision board.  I’m going to keep it one hundred and say that right now things aren’t nearly as good as I would like them be.  A lot of that is stress due to this and that.  I think attending some of these marriage building sessions can really help us learn how to not let outside things stress our marriage.
    I’m also thankful that both of JJ’s top front teeth are almost fully out.  We’ve been having a time with this whole teething situation.  I think at this point we’re both ready for a break from it.  We’re on Walk Watch.  He’s been itching to get down and do his own thing.  So, hopefully he’ll be walking unassisted in no time.
    I also did another two interviews this past week about YUMMommy and being a blogger.  So, I’ll be sharing more about those over the summer.  I’m just incredibly thankful for everything positive that has been going on.  And if you picked up a copy of the book yesterday, I’m thankful for that as well.  If not be sure to get it or at least spread the work about it! 
    I’m also thankful that today I’m featured over at Life of TOI as part of her She Rocks series!! Go check out my guest post here.
    What’s on your Thankful Thursday list?